Perfectionism.

Refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.

This morning I finally weighed myself like I'd promised. Not a very good number but not all that bad either. The scale at my neighbors said 119.4 lbs (about 54.1 kg). I haven't gained anything according to that number, but I have only lost about 0.2 pounds this past week. I think by the end of this week I would like to have lost AT LEAST one pound. Hopefully two. The thing is, though, I have this fear of failure and that is why it is so very hard for me to set goals. I feel like if I fail them I wont be able to deal with it and give up all together. I was thinking that if I actually set a goal and post it on here where I will be held accountable for it I might work extra hard to achieve it. As you might be able to tell, I am a HUGE perfectionist. Last semester I got A's in all of my classes because I couldn't handle not having a perfect 4.0 GPA.

Today I also tried to start the ABC diet but I think that pretty much failed. I was doing fairly well until my mother came home with Chinese food and that put my caloric intake easily above 500. I'll re-do the first day of ABC tomorrow and hopefully lose loads of weight by time it's over.  I've noticed that dinner always ruins the day for me so I'll try not eating anything all day tomorrow so that I'll have room for dinner and cake for my brother's birthday celebration. Two hours of ballet and one hour of modern dance tomorrow so that will be my workout for the day.
I've decided to post pics of myself once I am down to 110.... I WILL get there!
~Stay Strong and Fight On!~