Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Dear Ana

Dear Ana,
Why won't your whispers leave me alone.
They trickle through the cracks in my thoughts to posses me when I am weak,
And yet I am stuck in the middle.
I cannot escape you but you don't have all the control anymore.
My mouth has the control.
It wants to devour everything and often I let it.
Ana. You were supposed to stop this. 
I wanted skinny and I got it, but only for a fleeting, dreamlike moment.
I dream about that time now and try to remember how I did it.
You promised me perfection but you forgot to tell me perfection is impossible.
I want perfection.