Headache

I'm sick today :( Probably from all the cookies and frosting I ate last night with my little sister. For part of her birthday present I told her I would make pink piggy cookies with her so we spent the evening frosting and decorating them. We made quite a few and many were eaten during the process. It was fun at the time, but looking back I definitely regret it! I realize my actions don't really reflect the fact that I want to lose weight. I do, but for the past year my eating habits have become more out of habit than necessity. It's so hard to break it, but maybe the key to getting rid of an addiction is finding another to take it's place. Don't think I've lost any weight this week......I might even have gained. My dad's birthday is coming up so maybe I can find an excuse to buy something (a scale) at CVS without anyone knowing what it is.......This morning I was online and I found one for only $10 :)

Last night my little brother left for Kauai on a school field trip for two weeks. That's pretty exciting seeing as he is only 13.........then again I was 13 when I traveled to Thailand for three weeks. It was an amazing experience and it really has made me want to see more of the world. 

Lets see. So I did not count calories today and I haven't for the past few days because they have all been terrible. I woke up at one in the afternoon and had a sandwich with ham and cheese and lettuce. Then I had two cookies because sugar is so freaking addicting. Later I had chips with salsa and then some chicken for dinner. Blackberry ice cream, a bagel with butter, more cookies and I think that's all. Let's just say I am so ashamed to post this, but if I didn't it would kinda be lying. I am not worthy of ana. I can't say I have a problem because if you knew what I looked like you'd laugh. There are a lot of people out there who work hard to be thin and I don't deserve to be in the same category as them if I can't even lose weight. If all I want is to be skinny then why can't I just control myself?

My head is throbbing and my throat hurts so I think I'll go to sleep now. Oh, tonight is daylight savings time for me. Yay for losing an hour of sleep tonight. Not.